I'll Love you, I'll Kill you
by Black Alice Butterfly
Summary: A string of one-shots of what would happened if you just changed one factor. Mostly unrelated...  Most are inspired by songs and little ideas. Written by a fangirl who tends to be dissatisfied with Canon. Sorry if the chapters seem disjointed. Seb/Ciel
1. Dancing with the Devil

One-shot Written to: Dancing with the Devil by Breaking Benjamin

* * *

I've never been a good dancer. Not for ordinary waltzing or other such frivolities. By myself, I have tried, dancing to a beat that no one could hear…

I wouldn't know if it was good or not; I had no one to judge me for it.

But when it came to dancing in a figurative way, I was the expert. I knew which strings to pull, what buttons to push. I used everyone and everything possible- and that included myself. I was the king, the player. Until I was captured…the game was not over.

Oh, Sebastian had put it nicely when we were alone... He knew the inner workings of my mind; felt me down the blackest of the black pits of my nearly stone dead heart. He made sure of that, and told me so in a nearly mocking tone.

But I knew…knew he loved me for my sins and my cruelty. He most likely didn't know what it was (he did say that he didn't know what he felt for me…in many more words than this) but I knew what it was. I may have a nearly dead soul and heart, but nether less, I was human. My mind had not forgotten love.

We held a rather twisted love for each other…but it still ensnared us, irrevocable- at least, for me. Unconditional love was between us, but for all of that it was, it was… perhaps, to use a fanciful word- _evil._

And even that drove me to love him even more. I had no idea why.

I loved him so much that I'd use him for my own uses without too much qualm, but then I would feel guilty that I didn't feel too much guilt about it, then I would dismiss it…a never ending cycle.

His love for me…

He loved me so much that he'd kill me so he could have me all to himself. He would swallow me within pure darkness, be there all the while, comfort me with a sadistic edge in his voice, and I would be completely, and utterly _owned _by my demon.

We loved each other more for it. I wasn't blind- it was a sin-filled, plague-ridden love, but I simply didn't care.

So, I danced in the arms of the devil, maneuvering through the endless throngs of the pawns named humans, and I was being smothered in pure black…black feathers, names of my sins would dance past, and I would give each it's respects, but I still could not bring myself to care. I was with the demon, which in the end used me as much as I used him.

I knew I wouldn't last long doing this. I was happy…well, as happy as I could be when he kissed me to fulfill the contract.

So, I didn't get it when I woke up once more, the phantomhive ring on my finger. Why? Didn't he want my soul? Or…

Did Sebastian enjoy serving me? Impossible.

But when I asked him as such; this was his response:

Sebastian gave me a warmly smug, edged in evil, twisted smirk.

" I wanted to dance with my lord once more."

And I understood.

I smiled (or at least, I tried) at him in return, and gently hugged him. Brief, but he would know.

He knew that I belonged to him, and to him only. I was happy that I was able to dance with the demon that so ensnared me once more.

Then I pouted angrily. " Sebastian. Why did you disobey me?"

Sebastian's smile only grew wider. " Bocchan, you should know that demons are always in their own interests."

I snorted out a laugh and hugged him a bit more. " Yes…but you're back in my services, so don't think it will happen again."

Sebastian let out a (happy? It must be my imagination…) chuckle and clasped his arms around my body. " Yes, my lord."

Well, at least I knew it was genuine. He could not lie to me.

* * *

BAB: Well, this is the first installment of ILYIKY. I hope you enjoyed; I will be posting others...all AU, completely non-related.

these are products of my frustration with the new season. and my fangirling.

In this case, this basically what would have happened if Claude and Alois weren't there, and if Sebastian brought Ciel back anyway.

I Do not own: Kuroshitsuji, Monoshitsuji, nor Breaking Benjamin's Dancing with the devil.

9CEB2EE6-5EB0-2D00-5050-0C135F3C047A

1.03.01


	2. Breakdown

Song: Breakdown by Seether

* * *

A boy with black hair and eyes of the darkest cerulean sat a ways from the mansion of his home, his noble clothes standing out with a starkness that was nearly inappropriate as he sat on a hill- a hill with dying life, as the flowers had began to rot and the grass turned white. It was sunset, and the sun had sunk behind the horizon- well, as far as he could see.

His expression was thoughtful; his body was relaxed.

"…Butler of mine," he stated with carefulness. He really didn't want Sebastian here to hear him.

" The sun is gone, the flowers rot…words are spaces between us," he continued. " And I should have been drowning in the rivers I found of took and lost…"

" And I should have been drowning when you make me insecure," he admitted slowly. " So break me down if it makes you feel right- hate me now if it keeps you all right, you can break me down if it takes all your might."

Ciel gave a small smirk. " Because I'm so much more…than meets the eye…"

A mere mortal fooling a demon. How inappropriate; it was supposed to happen the other way around. The boy's gaze sharpened into keenness that would have ordinary men brought to their knees. He had manipulated everything…he knew. Humph, the prey does what it can to survive. And in all honesty, it was surprising that the butler didn't know his little game already.

He had faked memory loss; Alois- even though he wasn't technically a proper Trancy, he was a delectable pawn to use. You see, Ciel was the one who subtly implanted the idea for him to have him take away what Sebastian treasured most- him.

Ahh. The one mistake that Ciel made was that he fell in love with Sebastian before his soul was supposed to be collected.

But, he was so very much more than what met the eye…he was inordinately smarter than most gave him credit for, even Sebastian. He seemingly had destroyed his love for Sebastian when he had lost his memories.

Poor demon. He wouldn't know what hit him, then.

" I'm the one you can never trust," Ciel said in a rather caustic tone. Oh, even though he loved Sebastian, he did so in a darkly twisted manner. In fact, if it weren't love…well, he'd call it obsession. But in a way, he cared for his butler- so perhaps it was love, after all. " Because wounds are ways to reveal us…" Hah, Sebastian…did you really think I'd entrust you with everything? When you won't do the same for me? After all, last time I did something of the sort…well, I landed myself in a place where they wished for an angel to come help their needs. And the unspeakable happened.

Then his gaze softened minutely.

" I could have tried to devote my life to both of us," Oh, if you weren't a demon, and didn't see me as merely a delectable meal…I would have tried, Sebastian. I would have tried. " But it would be wasting my time when the world we have is yours…"

Ciel sighed, an expulsion of breath coming out between a pair of cherry-pink lips.

" So break me down if it makes you feel right, and hate me now if it keeps you all right…you can break me down if it takes all of your might, because…"

A rather ironic smirk twisted his lips. " I'm so…much more, than all of your lies…"

There was a soft " fwumph" as Ciel abruptly decided to abandon some of his decorum and simply lay down on the dead grass, one lone eye staring upwards.

"…Hate me? Break me…down…" he mumbled, the words beginning to fail him. Already, he felt better. Hn, maybe he should do things like this more often…

" Down…"

Would he roast in hell? Ciel didn't really think so, after all…well, he'd be in Sebastian's stomach or whatever really goes in there sooner or later. A form of limbo, perhaps?

" So break me down," Ciel said quietly after a period of silence. "- If it makes you feel right; and hate me now if it keeps you all right…you can break me down if it takes all your might…" It may very well do exactly that, Sebastian.

Tiredness, a weariness washed over the little boy who had to live too much, and a final ironic smirk flickered over his rosy lips.

" Because I'm so…much more than meets the eye."

With that, Ciel muttered out " Sebastian, come here…" knowing that his butler would find him, he closed his single eye and drifted off to the realm of dreams amongst the hill of the dead.

* * *

BAB: GOD DAMNIT. I WATCHED THE 12th EPISODE. THAT IS ALL THAT NEEDS TO BE SAID.

Dislaimer: I do not own breakdown, I do not own Kuroshitsuji or anything related except perhaps a few cosplay items. as far as I know I own the itty bitty plot of this AU fic.

9CEB2EE6-5EB0-2D00-5050-0C135F3C047A

1.03.01


	3. Victims of Love

Song: Victims of Love by Good Charlotte

* * *

Sebastian looked at his young master, sitting so quietly in the rickety boat he had used to journey in to defeat that last enemy of his charge.

His life was playing around him, and it was rather disconcerting how Sebastian knew how he was…well, in short time, he would fulfill that contract made from those years ago.

But he did warn his master in the beginning: you play with fire, it's going to burn you.

But when he thought upon it, he knew it was rather remarkable: the boy with the slyly white soul knew it would happen, and he did more than play with the fire: he danced with it- flickered back and forth with the ruby flame that taunted him, seared him, trained him to become what he had become.

Still, that boy had came back for more- after all, he wanted to win that most interesting game of " chess" as he so called it. the queen was defeated…in more ways than one.

So, he had won that game.

But when he saw the look of serenity on the boys face compared to the one of deadly concentration when he was playing the game of life- on a mere whim, he seriously considered which he liked best, and well- he found he couldn't decide which he liked more, to his surprise.

Ridiculous. He was a demon, and he had no use for such...sentimentality. Especially not for a mere human boy of thirteen. He was food, nothing else. Well, perhaps something to be toyed with, but nothing could have gained any affections.

Well…no. Sebastian had to reconsider it. The boy was like a demon in his own right, sharp and keen. Not to mention he had a deviousness that was entirely his own, toying with his fiancé, the queen, and indeed, Sebastian himself. As a demon, he had to admit that it attracted him.

Hmmm. Too bad he was going to eat the boy in short order.

All of a sudden, Ciel turned towards him; The demon was monmentarially shocked to see a smile on the boy's face. but what a smile it was; it was slow, sly and vicious. " Sebastian…" he said in a low, seductive voice.

Sebastian didn't know what to think. Had his master been possessed or something similar? Did he hit his head too hard in the water?

Then, his mind went blank.

You see, his very own master had stood up to kiss him on the lips; as if he would if he swallowed his soul.

Then, the namesake of the sky had drawn back, a satisfied smirk on his lips.

"…why…?" Sebastian asked, still in shock.

" Because I'm about to die, I might as well do something I probably won't regret." He said casually, as if he was talking about the weather. " and besides, I fell in love with you." He chuckled. " whoever said that love was holy was an idiot, by the way. Nothing farther from the truth…"

Silence existed between them for long, long minutes.

" Remember when you said to not play with fire, Sebastian?"

" yes, young master."

" I should return the favor; don't play with water or it might drown you…"

Sebastian blinked, then a slow, Cheshire cat smirk lifted up his lips. " yes…my lord."

Oh, but this was a curse…Sebastian suddenly realized with a regretful start.

They were, in fact…

Both victims of that odd factor named love.

Sebastian's smirk turned upside down. " oh no."

And now that he realized that, he had fallen in love with his prey, as a falcon would fall in love with a rabbit…

This was not good.

* * *

BAB: -sigh- Augh. the twelveth episode has me really getting kind of pissed and frustrated, so...expect more drabbles. and this particular one is faintly related to the Dancing with the Devil AU oneshot. note the faintly, by the way.

this AU is what could have happened during the first season and Ciel was about to die-but-didn't- and he was still on that boat thing. ( Personally I thought that the second season was just kind of F-ed up...)So yay, more lurvely Seb/Ciel.

I do not own Victims of Love, nor do I own anything related to Kuroshitsuji except some fanfics. and one-shots. and a few other stuff.


	4. Coin Operator Boy

Song: Coin Operator Boy by Porcelain and the Tramps

* * *

Twin sapphire orbs stared blankly at a silly little wind-up soldier that his fiancé had bought him.

It was new, of course. A little toy-wind up toy with the blank black dots for eyes and deathly pale skin- skin that would not belong to a human- a fine, shiny coat of pure black and red buckles. No chips…it wouldn't be allowed; after all it was gifted to the little unique master: a little boy with a tempered, slyly white soul.

And the little boy with the white soul stared at the pristine doll. He wondered if he could inflict a chip on that shiny, shiny paint. A little fault. Something he could use…

Ah, no.

That was what the wind-up was for…

A pair of white, unblemished hands extended to the cold, metallic of the little twisty thing that would wind up the toy.

And wind he did.

He watched the little toy walk a staggering sort march around a small space on his desk, unmindful of the paper towers surrounding the little man.

Humph. Sebastian would do so much better… the little boy thought. But then, it was a toy…so restricted.

It continued with it's staggering walk, ever faithful to the winding of the little silver key inserted in it's back.

If he removed the key, the doll would stop. And fall.

A slight smirk curled the boy's lips at the malice-tinted thought, then as soon as it came, it went.

Sebastian and the little toy weren't exactly opposites, were they not?

Ciel gave a slightly tired twitch to his lips in weary amusement- the joke was old to him, an old joke that lasted within him for these past years. " Twist, twist…" he mumbled under his breath.

Insert key, make the little man walk.

Insert soul, make the butler walk, talk, and do the impossible for you.

Hmm. He had the better deal, but then- what was a key, really? To a human? Nothing really. To the doll? Of vital importance.

A soul- well, now that was a true matter of perception. To a human it didn't really matter, or it mattered more than anything. The demon needed it to survive, on the other hand.

Tick-tick, tick-tick.

Not the sound of a clock, although you could say it was. No, it was in fact the key unwinding.

Ciel thoughtfully wondered if his contract doing the same. Hmmm. Well, in any case…

He steepled his fingers.

If it was Sebastian taking his soul, he didn't really mind. In fact, he'd like to die as a soul that his butler wanted.

Why?

…because he fell in love with the demon- the unattainable.

And like the toy, he wouldn't recuperate the affections.

Ciel accepted that.

_Thud._

The little toy had fallen over…

* * *

BAB: Yes, another drabble. it's short, it's good, and it COULD fit in canon. So yay.

the inspiration for this particular chapter was me having a rather odd trail of disturbing thoughts. One of them was " What if Ciel looked at Sebastian one day and compared him to a wind up toy? Only able to move because his soul was the key to make him do things..." And yeah, it's one-sided; but since this is mostly Ciel's point of view...well. ;D

I don't own Coin Operator boy, nor do I own Kuroshitsuji or anything related. 'cept the fanfics and maybe otherwise. but other than that, no way to change canon. ( This does make me sad. and I still say that the ending for the second season was totally stolen from fanfiction writers. :0 not that it'd ever be proven, which makes me feel slightly pissed.)


	5. Snow White Queen

Snow White Queen By Evanescence

* * *

Life was a white wonder world, filled with little dots of white that fell endlessly in a snowdrift. Little white caps that covered the grounds, little frozen perfections…until time moved for them, they would be like as such forever…

Ciel was one of these perfections. The little waif-like boy, so delicate and yet strong and ruthless within. Like the most fragile-appearing diamond sculpture. Beautiful, crystalline, and untouchable by all means… except blood and it's owner. A blue diamond…like on his thumb.

The little boy with the huge blue eyes and creamy ivory skin sat there on a black marble bench, his dark hair with the eerie blue tint enhanced by the little icicles forming on the delicately crafted hair. Rosy lips reddened by the cold of a mid-december morning, as flushed as if a lover had kissed him senseless. Blue eyes staring distantly on the grounds…the white roses had died long ago…

Sebastian was ordered to not bother the young master for the time being. However, it didn't mean he couldn't keep an eye on him, to make sure he didn't freeze to death.

Well. that's what he told himself.

The demon had made himself welcome in a discreet corner of a window, where he would see his young master and yet, not be seen himself.

So he sat there and watched.

Fire and ash watched Ice and water.

Almost reluctantly, Sebastian wished that he could enjoy the day with his young master. Not as master and servant, but as simple companions. His little charge was such a puzzle…old, yet young…like him, and yet not…perfection, and something utterly disgusting. A paradox, yet ever so simple at the same time. And oh…he wanted to figure him out.

He sighed. He was beginning to confuse himself.

He was supposed to watch the master, not bother himself with trying to figure out his little lord, his little nightingale that sang such complicated melodies.

But oh, it was tempting…

Speaking of tempting, the little boy had turned his body ever so slightly- and Sebastian had to struggle to not gape like some common fool at the sight.

Ciel was perfection.

If Demons could love- and he was truly beginning to wonder if they did- he was sure that he'd be in love with his master. Ciel was a beauty to behold, inside and out.

A white gloved hand, almost hesitantly reached for the glass in between the two. In that moment, Sebastian felt irritation against the innocent glass. He wanted to gather the little boy to himself, wanted to..

What did he want? His soul?

No…he wanted so much more than the boy's soul…he wanted to possess the boy, keep him like the most prized of dolls, destroy him, make him even more devastatingly perfect, use him, watch him from afar so he didn't mar the little waif…

He wanted to love him.

A shivering breath came out of the demon, long and ragged.

In a moment of silent weakness, Sebastian passed a hand around his eye area.

Two perfectly round wet spots marred the white fabric, and Sebastian looked at it blankly, feeling conflicted.

And still, the little boy sat outside, perfect and as confusing as ever.

* * *

BAB: Okay, okay... this isn't seriously affected by the song. Just inspired. Buuut, I'm half-considering on making a continuation on this particular one-shot...I'm not sure, though.

I don't own Kuroshitsuji or Snow white Queen. or anything related.


	6. So Cold

Song: So Cold by Breaking Benjamin

* * *

It was strangely cold in the isle of death, Sebastian absently noted as he held his master for what most likely was the last time.

Speaking of his master, Ciel was breathing little heated breaths over his highly sensitive ear, little breaths that reminded the two that the waif of merely thirteen was very much so alive and thriving.

And…frankly, it was distracting Sebastian.

Blue eyes serenely watched the pale and smooth neck of his demon, it's owner's head resting on a strong shoulder… and the sapphire blue was weary, yet nervous…but it held a sense of accomplishment.

Red eyes were tense, uncertain, held a spark of pain, but a dangerous lust threaded itself blackly through it's red.

Opposites, and…yet so similar.

Master and Servant.

Water and Fire.

Purity and Tainted.

Prey and Predator.

Player and Pawn.

Young and Old.

But beneath those soft bodies, that was where the differences ended.

Pride. Arrogance. Cruelty. Logic. Manipulative. Cynical. Weary. Driven. Loyalty. Trust.

_Love._

Almost imperceptibly, Sebastian leant his head against his soon-to-be meal and one true love. Not that he even recognized the emotion…not yet, anyhow.

He had killed an impure angel on his master's orders…idiot thing, thinking it to be something heroic, something untouched and pure. That was a right belonging to his master, his sky-his Ciel. Without the heroism. No, Ciel wasn't heroic, whatever he was. But pure? Untouched? That he was.

A pure thing like his master wouldn't start a fire just to purify, to cleanse. No, he would have seen it as a waste- he would have sent himself, Sebastian to dirty his hands, to kill for his master. Leave those who did nothing.

A tiny smile tugged on the corner of his mouth. His master. His butler. It was about to end…

He finally stepped through the last of the foliage and into a stone clearing.

For some reason, his heart hurt. It ached.

And he didn't know why.

With the tiniest of shrugs, stopped at the granite seat, and he sat his master on the stone bench. Many demons had sat here, many humans had their souls taken away in this very spot.

For some reason, he felt like his dear master was special.

For a long moment, the two stared at each other, drinking each other in.

Ciel- a cold, crystalline beauty. Dark, dark hair with the most curious blue gleam shimmering over it, a silky mess of royalty. Blue pools of melted sapphire, soft in this unguarded moment. Ivory-toned skin, soft and childish, radiating something untouched.

Sebastian-or really, whatever his name would is afterwards-

A dark, dark attraction. Feathered black hair, resembling a raven's foliage. Ruby red eyes that would glow with a supernatural light, and when it died down it would be a lure that pulls you in despite whatever will or defense you had. Paper-pale skin, one that shined dully as the moon's light glittered off of it.

The wind blew harshly through the stillness, making it's mark on the scene but doing nothing to break the moment.

Slowly, Sebastian stepped in closer to his charge, knelt down in front of the small little lord- his little prince. He wanted to lock him up in a tower, shield the world from him, so as to not taint his sheer purity and dangerous mind and serve him forever- but it was not meant to be. Humans simply disappeared faster, they were nothing to a demon's time line. Yet the five years in which he served felt like the most he had lived in a long time.

If he captured his soul now, he would forever remain like this…an ageless grace, the soul of a delicately strong child, aged beyond his years- indeed, beyond most adults.

But, he could not resist one thing that he had wanted from the boy- one thing he marked down to mostly lust, but something he wanted nether less.

Raging fire met Freezing water, and blue eyes widened in shock as his servant gently, gently pressed his lips to his own.

But the gentleness was not to last. Soon Sebastian's kiss had grown heated, and Ciel responded with a lust and passion forbidden from the normal of his age- responded with harsh, destroying, I-dare-you-to-make-me-scream-in-passion emotions, which Sebastian fed off of and nearly let a groan out at the resulting pleasuring shock to his nerves; but distantly, he was surprised. He had thought his lord would refuse him…

A yank on his jacket brought him back to the kiss, and he inwardly chuckled before forcefully plundering Ciel's mouth. His little master let out a reluctant groan, pushing his little waif body against Sebastian's- and so enticing it was…

Little fingers somehow made themselves up his white cotton shirt, and Sebastian was rather torn in between amusement, curiousity, and just overwhelming lust as those little fingers began carefully tracing up his torso.

Smoothly cold, just like his personality- Sebastian thought briefly before running a gloved hand through his master's hair.

Subtly, subtly, he began removing his master's soul. With every motion, Ciel Phantomhive began dying.

* * *

BAB: Feeling slightly perverted and a little tragic. Yeah, I like getting rid of emotions with these one-shots. so sue me.

Anyway, the sequel to this particular one-shot is coming up shortly. Huzzah. I hope you like it.

I do not own So Cold, nor anything related to KSS.


	7. So Cold the sequel

So Cold- The Sequel

* * *

A heart-rendering whimper, and all of Ciel, his master-no, former master, was gone.

Sebastian lifted his face from the child's; as promised-through cold touches and heated kisses, he had made the pain unbearable- and yet, the earl did not say anything, or even made a sound- well, until you counted the whimper…but otherwise, nothing.

Sebastian had to say that he was slightly impressed with the boy for the last time as he surveyed the small body.

Suddenly, a glint of white peeked out of the boy's pocket and his curiosity roused, despite himself, he gently lifted out the paper.

It was a letter.

Not just any letter- it was addressed to him.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, and opened it.

What he read inside made ruby red eyes widen.

" Dear Sebastian-or whatever your name is now, I suppose.

I'm dead, and either my soul is partaken by you or I have gone straight to hell; I don't think that god would exactly accept me, after all-not after what I did.

But no matter how foolishly human this is, I wanted to explain myself to you.

Where to start, though? I suppose I ought to thank you out of courtesy for taking care of me, and perhaps my rather selfish whims as well.

Despite many harsh actions to me, you have been the perfect butler, rest assured. You have done well in serving me, the queen's dog until the last minute.

Now you may laugh, and I may perhaps sound arrogant- and it may very well destroy any illusions that you may have had about me, but I will say this.

I think we have an understanding between each other. Torment each other, manipulate each other, use each other as pawns, and force the other to up their game- but we also played games of small kindnesses, to keep the other guessing. Don't get me wrong- I played those games with a genuine heart, like all of my other games- and I will say that I may have saw you as a pawn-MY pawn until the end.

I will have to say this though; I found comfort in you. You helped me sharpen my cynical view of the world, and you made me find some solace in that. You made me find some peace in simply using you, and you allowed me some childhood moments, as far as they were in between. True, I have shown a slight softness then, and you may have despised it, but you were tolerant of me then, no matter how human it may have be.

Would it be twisted of me to say, despite our rather simple and yet complicated relationship, I loved you?

I loved you so much that I would kill you, and I have no reservations that you would do the same for me. In fact, that is exactly what will happen- hopefully you have eaten my soul, so you know what I am talking about.

I suppose no matter how twisted it was, I loved you for all of what you were-and are, and I am grateful for what you have done for me.

Thank you.

~ Ciel Phantomhive"

Sebastian was ashamed to admit that a tear splashed on the precious document before he carefully put it in his own pocket.

Ciel had it right. Exactly right.

He knew he had made a good choice in master, but…

" I don't think I knew you fell in love with me, like I fell in love with you," he addressed the dead body of the boy, who simply looked as if he was sleeping.

And that was how the demon found out what love really, truly was... a little too late.

" I wish that you could be re-incarnated now; it simply seems like a great shame for you to be so beautifully tainted, yet not bloom like a black rose once more." The older demon mused, a single finger tapping at his lips.

A sigh extracted itself from the demon's lips as he smoothed over his former master's hair, mussed from a previous passion that they had taken part of.

" I wish you were a little less stubborn and simply had told me sooner- I may have done something different." He murmured, lifting the body into his arms and placing it gently into the boat, rocking gently.

" Goodbye, Bocchan. I loved you."

A wash of black feathers, and he was gone...

_( Nevermore...)_

_

* * *

_

BAB: eh...not my best. Again, these drabbles are something I use to rant. I don't own nothin'.


	8. Hurricane

Hurricane By 30 seconds to mars

* * *

Sebastian quietly sat on a bed that his master had provided for him- it was kept up as a pretense, so that people would think he was human. And, Ciel wanted him to work to the best of his abilities, so if he wished to have the luxury of sleeping…he would sleep. And, sometimes he did.

Sebastian had no hesitation in his mind when he thought that he held a great deal of respect for his little sky, his Ciel. Filled with puffy clouds that looked comfortable, but an unpleasant wetness when you actually went into them. He chuckled briefly at the comparison. It matched his personality.

He had come to terms that he was serving a thirteen year old master, who acted far more mature than any child had given right to be, one that sometimes acted a bit like a brat, ( but sometimes, he did so purposely so that Sebastian would be reminded of his age, Sebastian was nearly sure- and for his own personal amusement, which he could understand. After all, he did the same) and played an endless series of mind games with him.

However, in the end they were simply a master and a servant.

He would kill for Ciel so as not to taint his hands. He would tell lies to other, undeserving people not worthy of the truth like Ciel was. He would deceive Ciel, maybe- but he would not hurt him in any way. No matter what, Ciel had his faith and trust in the last person that would deserve it- Him, Sebastian. And not just any kind of faith and trust- one that completely understood him without saying anything, with pure intentions. It wasn't a blind faith and trust, but all the same, he was the _only _one. The _only _constant for _his master._ And damn it, even without the contract, he would stick with him until he ate his soul.

Because his Master…he was kind in a certain way. He would make his decisions, he would stick by them, with the full knowledge of what was going on. After all, he may look like a thirteen year old, but he could handle it.

He was kind to his servants. He complimented them. Even when they did things wrong, and Sebastian had to fix it. But they didn't have his whole trust. And that was a tribute he only paid to his butler. And he knew that he wasn't going to back out of giving him his soul. He _knew _Sebastian was utterly worth it.

Together, they were a hurricane through a brief moment of life, like watching a butterfly alight upon a flower- and when you blinked, it was gone.

Sometimes, Sebastian looked at his master and wondered if he was telling his butler that he'd better enjoy what he could before he took his soul and left the life they led together.

" What is lost can never be found again…" a sigh rushed out of a demon's perfect, usually smiling mouth. Right now however…he felt old.

Ciel would win some, loose some. Sebastian would win some, loose some. In the end, did it even matter? No matter what, their fate would be winded closely together. The contract, their _will, _their _faith _would make sure of that.

What they had right now was crystallized, immortal. Ciel was a butterfly in a world of moths, a single blue rose in the field of white roses.

Sebastian was the lamp in the world of moths, and the butterfly would haughtily alight on the lamp, but not get consumed by the flame until the last minute. The blue rose was entranced by it's fellow black rose, beside it.

Silence made its mark in his bedroom, his shallow, luxury-filled inhales and exhales of breath passing from his lips.

Distantly, he noticed he had gotten up to look at the city outside the mansion, beyond the far stretch of green land that he took care to maintain.

" the city looks like it's on fire…" he mumbled, wine-colored depths staring at the newfangled street lamps in the streets. A flash of red- maybe explosions? Would race sometimes through the air. He would say it was that annoying red shinigami, Grell, his name was? Ah, yes. Grell. But no, it was brief and filled with fire, not blood. Just like his master.

" I would do anything for my master." He stated firmly in the silence of his room. And indeed, he would do anything. Even…

_Even what?_

A shuddering sigh, a moment of weakness for the strong demon, slave to a thirteen year old.

" I would love him. And…I already do. I love him with the force of a typhoon, crashing through whatever petty obstacle hindered me. And… what have I done?" he said quietly, in slight horror.

He closed his eyes. His master would hate him for loving him. He would be an obstacle now, hindering Ciel's path for using him, and stopping the demon from giving his master the proper ending he had chosen.

And it _hurt, it hurt…_

But the typhoon wouldn't stop, like his love for his master would not ever end…

He closed his eyes. He felt pain.

He felt a small, delicate pair of arms encircle around his waist, like the fleeting caress of the butterfly. A small head- a _child's _head rested against the small of the aincent demon's back.

" Sebastian?"

with a surge, the typhoon stuttered and came in devastating force. He had to control himself. He wouldn't allow himself to return the hug. He couldn't. and what if it was a mind game? He had to try, to _try _stand up to him in this moment of weakness. " Yes, Bocchan?" the words rolled off of his tongue, and it was so _bittersweet._

" I love you." It was decisive, it was firm, and it was filled with the character of a master who had faith in him, trust in him, and filled with an expected pain that was to come. " it's disgusting, I know you'll think. Work around it if it interferes with your loyalty to me." His voice didn't waver, didn't sound forced. The child holding him was…incredible…

a perfect tear rolled down his face. it wasn't supposed to happen, yet here they were. And he felt disgustingly human, but…he used to be human. He did feel emotions, after all.

A long moment of a servant and master, caught in the middle of a hurricane of emotions. Fire raced through their veins, and Sebastian turned. A look of complete understanding passed between them, and he knelt down- he always would, a prideful demon like him, if it meant his little master was alright- gently disengaged the arms holding him, and slowly lowered his face to his master.

" I love you too, Bocchan. It's disgustingly humane, but I assure you, I will be with you till the end. Take it however you will."

A light alit up in his master's eyes, and somehow, lips found another, and they were _together, _and no one would tear them apart. Immortality at it's best. Master and servant, Butterfly and Lamp, Black Rose and Blue Rose, Young and Old, Freezing Rain and Lightning.

* * *

BAB: I decided to take a break from the rather sweetly angsty one-shots I usually write. Hope you enjoy this one! Review~


	9. My Black Deliliah

My Black Delilah by Hollywood Undead

* * *

A black figure stood silently within a burning swath of flames, the red and orange and yellow and purple beating a complicated, rapid tattoo against it's clothes, reaching to a sky that would never exist.

Shoes shifted silently on a burning, burning ground, disrupting a miniscule wave of black dust settling quietly on an even blacker cliff, the shining black rock sometimes peeking out of the black sand, reflecting in the burning, searing light.

A putrid breeze blew, silently, silently-disrupted the complicated tempo that the flames had set, a brief moment of simply _burning, burning, burning_ and _searing_ heat- and it began again, a new, more complicated tempo pounding away inside the flame. The black figure still stood, appearance not bothered.

The heat inside the flames seared away at his skin, but a pair of wine-colored eyes stared blankly into the distance of hell.

In back of the figure, in back of the flames- there was a large field of black flowers-Delilah's- and towering over the delicate black flowers, blooming despite all odds within hell, was a large house- in fact, a mansion. An almost filthily extravagant looking mansion by most standards- yet, in the greedy way that demons liked to make things- houses, sex, souls- it was in fact rather _quaint._

However, the black figure in the burning, burning flames didn't seem to like it particularly. In fact, he hated it, the whole mansion- in all of its greedy richness, tainted, tainted by the wealth in hell. Just like his…master.

Grief briefly flashed in his red eyes, and a sort of desperation glimmered, remaining when the grief was covered up.

Slowly, slowly, the figure sat down on the burning, dust-covered ground of the cliff, unmindful of the flames scorching him. Almost painstakingly, he rested his face in his hands.

If it wouldn't simply dry up in the burning pits of hell, Sebastian (as the figure was known by) would have cried. What that miserable demon and his little contractor- Claude and…Alois Trancy, was it…? Had _done _to his little Bocchan…_Ciel…_

Oh, he was plenty hungry for his now-missing soul of his master. He refused to call him Ciel. Or Bocchan. No, he was nothing to Sebastian now. Just bound by his sense of remaining loyalty to _Ciel, His Ciel._ But he would give up the soul to eat if he could just _have him again._

He stared at his pale, unmarked hands. No blemishes, just that dreadful contract- all he had left of his Ciel. Just a reminder of what they _could have been. If they had just given up there pride for one…millisecond…one…instant…_

Sebastian grimaced in fleeting agony. _Ciel…Bocchan…Ciel…!_

His current master was now a hollow being of _him_. His soul's _shell_. He had no soul to light up his eyes in a grim triumph when he won a chess game, or savor a new delicacy created by his butler's hands with a sort of half-happy disappointment, half guilty pleasure, and a sort of haughtiness. He wouldn't have an exasperated, slightly fond look in his eyes when he had to endure the ratings of that blond girl…Elizabeth, her name was? Ah, yes. Lady Elizabeth. He wouldn't have that adorable pout on his face when he danced- or tried, at least. There would be no playful, mischievous glint as they played their little games with each other. No spark of passion, no sense of irony when he defied the world time and time again. And…most of all, he wouldn't have that…_look _that paralyzed Sebastian when he looked at him sometimes. Wouldn't have that need to turn to him for comfort when he let down his walls for a moment.

No…this…._ thing _that had fashioned itself in his body had none of that. Just a complete stranger.

Sebastian had long ago realized that he had _loved _Ciel. He would move heaven and earth for him. And hell. On a mere flick of the hand, he would have done it _eagerly,_ wanting to see the result of his unemotional-looking master's boredom- or otherwise. What _purpose _it would bring. After all, Ciel would have done it for a reason, and he would have done it decisively. No frilly-frilly. Sebastian had loved that, too. It was part of Ciel, after all…

Sebastian bit his flawless lip. His… _employer_… graciously gave him a break today_…_and he was free to do as he wished. So, the demon got up from the wreath of burning fire and dust, and began walking on to journey into the boy's gardens. Or rather, his 'attempt' of them- Sebastian was nearly _sure _that he made them so that he would be reminded of his _Ciel _again.

Journeying out of the flames, into the hard, rocky earth, occasionally crunching on the stray lava pebble- he walked into the huge field of black Delilah's.

He picked one up in his hand.

It crumbled into black dust in his hand, despite barely touching it.

Sebastian felt his heart tear in two as he was painfully reminded of how he remembered the last order that Ciel had given him- and look how well _that _turned out, he told himself bitterly.

_" What is lost can never be found."_

The voice of his master, _Ciel _seemed to echo in his head like an eerie mantra, filled with no beginning and having no end- just like the beating pulse of the fire that he had sat in brief moments ago...

A brief pause_, (like the breath of the wind that disturbed it)_ and it began again, only with a different uttering.

_" There are two types of people in the world; those who steal and those who are stolen from. I just stole your future…that's all."_

Sebastian sank to his knees in the hard, heated ground of hell.

" Oh, but Ciel…they stole you from me…"

And a single, perfect tear dripped from his face- and it sizzled away in the heat, never to be seen again.

* * *

BAB: Oh man, I swear- this thing is like an effin' pregnant woman. It demanded sweet and emotional last time, now it's more like stab-a-knife-in-your-heart-and-twist. I don't own the song nor do I own Kuroshitsuji. I wish I owned the latter. Thanks to all who reviewed on Hurricane! I hope you enjoy this new chapter.


	10. Still Doll

Song: Still Doll ( Male Version) By Kanon Wakeshima

* * *

Sebastian felt a cruel smile curl his lips as he watched his master sleep. Ciel had a nightmare- so fragile these humans were! - And Sebastian felt the need to stay by his side. That little urge of his confused him, though. None-the-less, he quieted that particular little question of a simple "why?" with what he thought was the answer: It would be the most efficient thing to stay by his little bocchan, as he didn't sleep anyhow. It would save time if he woke up.

He stared more intently at Ciel's face, pale and glowing in the moonlight of a disturbed pair of curtains. This particular little master had blue glass marbles for eyes, and it both disturbed and delighted the demon. He was much too young to have such eyes… Those eyes, so delightful… a tongue threatened to slip out and lick perfect lips. What kind of dream do they see? Are…fascinated with…?

A chuckle quickly smothered rumbled in Sebastian's chest- just for a moment. Then his amusement dimmed, and a cold cruel little shred of amusement remained in his heart, as usual. This little master…he does not know happiness, and Sebastian worked every minute to make sure he stayed the same way he was now. None-the-less…he smiled because of it. Was it wrong that a demon smiled while the child stared at you with such cold, unforgiving eyes? Was it wrong that really, deep, deep down…he smiled such an evil smile for him?

Sebastian was unforgiving, he was a demon. But he…felt sorry for Ciel at times, delighting in moments of silent rebellion inside his head. Ciel would not like to hear that his butler felt pity, no he would not. But he would never know, would he? To those wonderful glass eyes, down to his demonic last hair…he belonged to his master. Until the contract was fulfilled, it would remain so. And they would play with each other like little rag dolls. Ruthlessly.

Continuing with his thoughts, his eyes traced every inch, every crevice over Ciel's body- or what available to the demon- easing boredom. Suddenly, he noticed that his master's lips were a lovely peach. A smirk quirked his lips. With those fruitful lips- to whom does love cast away? Is…lamented? Although no one would lament for him. Sebastian made sure of that.

A rise of uneasiness rose in his unbeaten heart, protesting wildly that no one would lament for his precious master. He ruthlessly squashed it. No, already…the song to love can't- couldn't- be sung by either of them. It was a matter of pride…

He cast his wine-red eyes upon the lids of his young master's face, where it hid glass-blue eyes. Still…he did not answer…?

* * *

Me: Sowwy for not updating. Also, sorry this is so danged short. I do not own Kuroshitsuji. I own this fanfic where I get rid of my frustration. and any merchandise I may buy and crap.


	11. Take me to the Hospital

Song: Take me to the Hospital by The Faint

* * *

Ciel dreamed of falling through an endless, black vortex. He only felt the feeling of ever-falling, the adrenaline singing through his veins, burning paths as it went and one blue eye, one violet one- decorated with the contract- twitched like as if one was in a feverish dream. Only it felt ever so real, and no one was here to save the pure, pure fallen child.

Ciel saw others like him, nameless faces and lives that had been lived like his own- great people, possessing the same mind, the same attitude…and some forged their way the world, and some- like him- didn't. They were meant to stay in the shadows, silently-ever, ever so silently- manipulating through tendrils of darkness that would grasp and _keep _you and _possess _you until you couldn't _think…_

But he passed them all, whether he rose or fell it didn't matter- he was passing them, and that was all that counted. He felt a whimsical, almost giddy feeling surge in him in outrage, reminding him of the insane adrenaline. Somehow he knew he was going to die. He was going to life. He was going to give everything…

He loved, he hated, he felt horror and felt triumph. He was cold, there was hot, hot, hot and oh- his family was burning! But he loved the fire; it was a cold pain that raced through his veins at the feeling of being burned alive by a fire that would never judge him for what he did… He trembled, weak just for a _moment _and no one would ever care, just the fire just might-just might-might…

Ciel's thoughts were swallowed by blackness once again. Colors now- colors began invading his vision, crazy pink and obscene yellow-green-black-red-purple-orange-yellow-blue-blue-blue-blue-!

_Splash. _

Ciel felt jolted awake by the feeling of cold sensation, by _not dying, _by _dying-_and he didn't know anymore.

Darkness now slowly seeped through his vision, enveloping him in a seductive sin, piercing through his veins…his sight was swallowed first. His taste. His touch. His life.

The darkness whispered comforting things, cradling a boy who hated the light and shunned it whenever possible, which coldly manipulated, who killed silently without wetting his hands with blood…and Ciel could only respond to feel content…

_" You lied, my Lord. You promised to live until I got down to Zero."_

He responded, feeling deadly tired. _" I…lied…?"_

The fire engulfed him, and he was remembered of life. His duty. He couldn't give his life to death- he had promised-!

_" I won't let you die yet." _The fire said, as if echoing his thoughts.

_" Ah…that's right…you don't lie," _Ciel said, almost whimsically to the fire, holding him in his lovely grip. _" There's something I want to ask you…"_ He continued.

_" Yes, my Lord?"_

He had to ask the fire. He had to. _" Who are you now…?"_

_" What a silly question."_ The fire answered, and Ciel felt muddled, confused.

_" Bocchan, when you own me, I am forever your demon of a butler."_

Ciel felt peace seep through him, the fire comforting him instead of the darkness. …Sebastian and the fire were one and the same. And while perhaps…The devourer didn't love its meal, the meal loved the devourer enough to let it be eaten without complaint.

* * *

BAB: I do not own. at all. You know the drill. And I thank each and every one of my reviewers! :D ( Oh, and this takes place in the last episode. Basically what happened if Ciel fainted while he fell from the bridge. Not too much love...but I think I kept it almost obscenely in character. -frowns at the one shot- Darn you inner Ciel. Darn you. if I had to have most of your personality, then I should have gotten a Sebastian, too!)


	12. I Don't Care

Song: I Don't Care by Apocalyptica

* * *

Raven-black hair tickled a pale, smooth jaw. Wine-red eyes, with the barest flecks of rusting iron stared at an expensive carpet. Three pairs of leather shoes, all stacked neatly in a row in a nearby corner shined dully, the light coming from an open window. Curtains moved in a slow dance, abruptly silently rising in the air then dipping back to meet the wall below the window.

Sebastian was thinking on something that to be truthful, he had thought a lot on. He may protest that it was only needed for serving his master, but to himself- he had to admit sometimes it went a little overboard. Just to him-self, though. It…would…well, be a little embarrassing if anyone knew. Certainly, it would spoil the perfect butler image he crafted.

A smooth chuckle emitted from his lips, quiet yet echoing in the silence. In the distance, a bed creaked. Probably in the room Finny, Bard, and Meyrin shared.

This particular thought was on his master, a much-used object for thinking on. After all, he was really quite interesting…a welcome entertainment for a demon like him- although if his master knew he was entertainment, he would probably…either feel rather sardonically complimented, insulted, or simply shrug it off.

You see, today was his birthday. And while this was normally a source of discomfort for his Bocchan-as it was his parent's death day as well, He had also noticed that recently, the Lady Elizabeth was…beginning to grate on his master's nerves. To be truthful he didn't really understand why, the Lady was the same as ever? Perhaps a trifle more loving of cute things and the color pink, and a little harder in her hugs for Bocchan.

Hmm. Perhaps since he was growing up, he found her more annoying? She simply rubbed his nerves before. And he meant that negatively. A slight smirk tilted his lips, and then it was gone.

In any case, Lady Elizabeth…well, found it suitable to push Ciel's birthday on him. Presents, making him take a walk with her…on and on. Bocchan didn't find this terribly…inviting, so he was in a bad mood when he finally shook her off and she went home.

Sebastian had watched his step then, only putting his usual mental jabs at his master in the right places, so as to relax Ciel and let him return the favor. However, he could have _sworn _he saw a twitch of Ciel's lips at one point. How very odd. In any case, when Ciel had settled back in, Sebastian deemed it suitable to make a cake for his master. Not one that necessarily said " Happy Birthday, Ciel" or anything, but just his favorite cake. Either he'd like it and not call it on him or not. So he served it, and he got a nod of appreciation. Deciding to push his luck a little, Sebastian filled the vase beside Ciel's bed with white roses. Ciel gave a slightly knowing, half-amused look when he spied them at bedtime, then crawled under the covers.

Sebastian had gone back to his room then, having deemed his duty done for the day. And now he was thinking about his master.

He knew the dangers of consuming too many souls, then serving a contract particularly interesting. Slowly, over time…he would develop emotion. And to him, Ciel was one such interesting contract. But…there was one emotion that Demons rarely had formed due to their nature, and he feared he had.

Love.

To be truthful, it was a sort of compromise between God and the Devil. And the most holy one could get without becoming an angel again.

And…it was terribly powerful, but rather an unsavory emotion to have. If anyone knew he possessed it, he would most likely become a laughingstock. But, he had to say that Ciel would be worth Love… No, no. He was a human…he faded as fast as the roses on his nightstand. Even faster, for the contract whittled away at whatever life Ciel could of had in the future.

He'd be a fool for falling in love for a human like that.

But all the same…

Sebastian sighed. To be honest…there was only one-way to find out if he was really, truly…well. In love...

Silently padding on his expensive carpet, he briefly felt a moment of indecision. Should he find this particular notion in his butler uniform, or should he be what he really was for tonight? It was symbolic, no matter what he chose.

…No, a compromise between the two would work best.

Quickly, he took off his gloves- not like his master would see him, anyhow…just personal self-satisfaction- and took off his vest, leaving him a faintly rumpled shirt and pants. He…felt…freer, just a little. This would do.

Treading silently, he opened a well-oiled door to his room and crept out. Really, he oughtn't be doing this- but it was night, he could be quick, and…oh dear, was that excitement? He was over a thousand, not a human teenager! He was…Oh, Fire and Brimstone. Screw this, he wasn't even thinking on the topic anymore. He was going to do it, and depending on the result, he might forget it ever happened.

Yes. That was what he'd do.

So he treaded through the hallways. If the heart in his chest beat, it would be hammering right now, he was sure. If his master woke up, everything would be over. And it was risky. But he could do it.

After an age, he had reached his master's room. The door's knob slowly, silently twisted and Sebastian quietly stepped into the room, easing the door behind him into being shut. He worried his lip a little. Should he really be doing this? No, don't think about it. Just do it already, you dolt. You're a demon. You shouldn't be thinking about _morals._

And so, the demon tiptoed over to where his sleeping master lay.

He bent over him, silently considering if it was worth it. Deciding it was, he lowered his face to his master's and kissed him.

It was an age, a moment, and a decade before he ended the precious moment. And a perfect butler's wine red eyes, flecked with iron rust were filled with a tender bittersweet feeling.

They looked at the white roses, and dimly, in the darkness- they glowed with an unearthly light. Just for tonight, Sebastian thought whimsically. On impulse- and perhaps a bad one, but he didn't really care at the moment- Sebastian plucked a singularly beautiful one and laid it in his master's hand. Kissing the young boy's cheek, he breathed out a " Happy Birthday," before departing, melting into the shadows as he went.

Yes, Sebastian was now sure of it- he was in love with the boy. The question was- how was he going to do the contract now?

In the darkness of Ciel's bedroom, there was an expectant, brief period of silence.

Blue eyes, shocking as the ring that he normally wore and the color of a deep winter sky on a clear day opened in the darkness of the bedroom.

" Thanks, Sebastian. I love you too." Ciel's little white fingers curled around the flower.

And that was about as close he could ever get to an " I love you," Ciel supposed- or at least one that he didn't order from him.

* * *

BAB: D'aw. Happy Birthday Ciel! –cheers slightly- Please enjoy the new One-shot! Thank you to all of my lovely, lovely reviewers! And I know that Ciel was acting a tiny bit off at the end, but...it's so god damn late at night over here. ( Or at least when I wrote this, hah.) So, yeah. Enjoy the kind-of-fluff.


	13. Butterflies Never Die

Song: Butterflies Never Die by Broken Iris

* * *

Because you love him. Because you hate him. It's sad, and it's beautiful. You're filthy, and you're lovely. You are sin, but you love.

Because it's deathly serious, but it's a joke.

Because it's _fire_-bleeding smoke and spitting sparks and wreaking destruction over a previously lovely green landscape, virgin and untouched-Then it's _Hell, _with the fire burning and beating a seductive tattoo against a smokey grey sky, filled with ashes and the deathly scent of humanity.

Because it's _water_-A cold, overwhelmingly simple mix of saltwater and other flavors; The grittiness of dusty sand and the stones that provide the steadiness of what it is-A smooth descent into death to be overflowing with it, A beautiful, tragic death-A sort of numb bliss that comes, providing a sea of colors when you die.

Because you love him.

Sebastian and Ciel's love could only be explained in so many words. It was complicated-Terrifying as well, but neither of them was one to turn down any challenge. It was twisted, and it grew _thorns... Great, vicious thorns that scrabbled with agonizing slowness over their flesh, tearing greedily into them...Hurting...Hurting them._

_And still..._

There was no gentleness about this love. It bordered on obsession, on dependence. Of shared loneliness. Deception. They were malicious by nature, but they had to keep up perfection. So they rid their frustration on each other, smugly, subtly, _quietly._ Never the less, they were bound deeply by what they had done, what they had shared.

And they didn't mind.

Because he was a demon, he was an ominous presence, coaxing the sins out of others with a smile that could charm the dead, with a lovely voice enchanting the nasty virtues to stay calm and let the horrible sins of humanity out, with a greedily consuming hunger that would destroy you if you got close- A great burning feeling that was not unlike being frozen to death. Even so though... The water would be eventually become part of the air that the fire consumed greedily.

* * *

_Ciel dreamed of a dark blue world, where there was flowers everywhere and it was an everlasting twilight. Broken glass and chipped chess pieces were the ground he walked upon, and butterflies were everlasting in his twilight-lit world._

_Humanity was far back behind him, baring it's impotence and desperate hopes and dreams to those who dared looking at it. _

_No light was given in his twilight world. No real darkness. Time apparently did not run here, simply existence and the breathing beat of his own humanity, trapped inside between the feathery brush of butterfly wings and broken glass. Harmonized insanity was the song and game, the beat and flow of their existence here..._

_Almost unwillingly, he extended a hand... A bright, shining white butterfly settled on it. Distantly, he remembered that butterflies liked to eat rotting bodies. He could crush it now. But he wouldn't, because it was his own choice, really. In twisted resemblance, he took after the butterfly in some ways. He could be crushed by Sebastian, if Sebastian broke his anesthetics and decided to devour his soul. But he wouldn't._

_His life would be as fleeting as the flowers, as the butterflies._

_But in his twilight wonder world, they would all never die-And live in a desperate fantasy, a quickly fading hope- a fleeting dream, but in this moment... They were immortalized..._

_

* * *

_Perhaps it was ironic that they loved each other, but never dared to let up the relentlessly cruel game of mocking the other, of teasing, of standards and mental jabs. They were arrogant together, they were prideful, they worked in a seamless fashion together, they were condencending- But they were afraid, hopelessly, desperately afraid to fall for each other.

They didn't want to respect each other.

They didn't want to trust the other.

They certainly didn't want to love the other.

They were simply too scared to feel love, so they hurt the other instead. Yes... _That _would be ironic, wouldn't it? Star crossed lovers of the strangest sort... To think!

* * *

_If Sebastian to answer honestly of what he wanted from his master, he wouldn't be able to give you a straight answer._

_He wanted to break Ciel, and he wanted to keep him locked up, very safe and hidden away from the sight of humanity. He wanted to put him on a shelf like a doll and forget about him, so that whatever was blooming in his unbeating heart could just die quietly and not spread like a cancerous tumor. He wanted to tear his master to pieces, and he just wanted to love him and cherish him, although it was against his nature._

_He honestly didn't know, really._

_This was why it was safer to obey his master's orders. Then it was easier to shut away his wants and quiet them with the promise that he was doing what Ciel wanted._

_

* * *

_But they understood each other to the point of pain. Perhaps it wasn't so strange that they fell in love with what they saw.

Birds of a feather flock together, or perhaps a kitten frolicked with the raven? Perhaps it didn't matter.

* * *

_Sometimes Ciel would wake up in the middle of the night, gasping and wishing for the unattainable. Love was impossible for him, especially between the hunter and the prey. It was only a matter of time before the prey's time was up and he could not lead the hunter on a merry chase. _

_So he would take the poisoned apple... Knowing what was inside, he would eat it down to it's very core._

_It was better this way, anyway. No one would ever know, and when he finally died... Perhaps he could be in his lonely wonder world, at least._

_

* * *

_

_It was a century after Ciel had died. Things had not changed in the island of the lost, except for a few things._

_Sebastian cradled a doll, made of bits from his master's body from long ago. It was still, life-sized and perfect. A haunted expression was etched permanently into the handsome face of the demon as he absently rocked the doll back and forth, a mocking parody of how he carried the real thing when it was still alive._

_"Float onto the painted sky where we shall be unified as I slip inside... Where butterflies... Never die..."_

_Sebastian's smooth baritone sang in a crackling croon, aged from years of disuse and use, depending on the week or year._

_Silence reigned for a while, then he spoke quietly._

_" Ciel, the mansion is gone. A factory is built over it- London; our london is gone. Only landmarks remain... The world has changed, wars have come and went. But do you know what I see...?"_

_A beat of silence, and he continued. " I see a grand mansion, surrounded by a beautiful garden filled with white roses and grand trees and pathways. There is a blond idiot in the yard, with a straw hat and a weed killer that he had forgotten to fix again, needlessly killing the plants. I see a cook in the kitchen, impatient as he tries to cook some kind of edible food with a flamethrower. I see a clumsy maid who constantly breaks the dishes and polishes the rails with shoe polish. And I see a young master, sitting in his study and doing some boring paperwork. And I see his butler, bringing some cake or the other... And the Master's eyes light up in a sort of reluctant approval, while the butler tries to smother a surge of amusement._

_They were happy together."_

_And he drew the cold doll of Ciel close, dry sobs racking his frame as he thought of a dream that could of been, that should've been, and most of all... It had been._

_And he had found out, too late that he loved Ciel._

_

* * *

_Wasn't t beautiful? Wasn't it twisted, wasn't it painfully ironic?

Wasn't it such a lonely thing to have?

* * *

BAB: Okay, it's been a while. Please don't kill me. I don't own Kuroshitsuji. Please review!

(On a side note, I nearly cried when I wrote the last part. Just sayin'. But damn this thing _is_ really like a pregnant woman.)


	14. Dear Agony

Song: Breaking Benjamin- Dear Agony

* * *

Death was lovely, Ciel thought in between dizzying breaths of brief, passing life that flowed out in a devastating flow. A great fire consumed the flow with a jaggedly painful greed, consuming his very being with charming lips and a darkly saccharine promise of eternal.

He moved weakly below the fire-Somehow, a cold flush of air had ghosted up his flesh-Odd seeing as he was sure his world was that almost that unbearable heat.

Fingers of the fire danced a hot, peppery dance up his weak flesh, and he trembled-With excitement, with pain. And he knew-too late-That he loved the fire...

The pain tore into the flesh of his mouth, and he could only respond with a gentle, imperceptible movement in return-Cold, cherry red lips briefly massaged pale, flawless fire. Death was lovely... Lovely...A brief flash of dizziness, and Ciel moved his head drunkenly under the fire before coming back to his senses.

If his end was this, Ciel didn't mind.

The earth would move without him. The skies would still have clouds that floated over the surface of the earth, and flowers would still bloom.

* * *

_Ciel stared up at the ornate ceiling of his room, sluggish and weak as he absently traced patterns in the blue symbols with his mind. He could not move, would not move for fear of sinking back into the nightmares, into the hellish depths of a fevered dream. In the dream..._

_He was in a ruined world, with a very clear sense of something wrong. A sea of blood was still and silent beneath the ruined towers, darkly showing a white, ghastly moon and skeleton trees. _

_He had looked up then, and saw with a horror- a force that mattered then, within the dream- that the moon was black._

_He looked back around, and gone was the ruins- A foul stench was the very air he breathed, and a sandy wasteland ringed in fire and covered with wailing children, beaten and curled up in small cages that were stained with blood, vomit and god knows what other substances. They weren't even attempting to escape anymore. Bile rose to his throat, but he firmly pushed down the fear, the horror. He was different, and he had escaped. He had been one of them once, but no more. He knew they didn't want pity, just help. _

_He gave them sympathy, but...In the end, he was only human. If they didn't try, they didn't get out. They were resigned, and Ciel respected that._

_So he closed his eyes to the suffering and waited until he woke up._

_So he did._

_And now, Sebastian wouldn't come. Because Ciel wouldn't call for him. It was too late, and he wanted to be alone. He didn't wish to be mocked by the demon with no faults-After all, he was human, and of course he had faults. He even accepted that. But it didn't stop him from getting better, didn't it? But illness... that was different. Suddenly, the need to vomit made itself clear to him. Tiredly, because he could sense that it would hold at bay for a while...He got up and journeyed to the bathroom. He could vomit into the chamber pot, no harm done._

_But the wails of the children still echoed in his ears. Sebastian wouldn't come for them- And in a brief, guilty moment he felt pleasure that the demon belonged to him and not them._

* * *

Ciel's heart beat weakly, a pale comparison to the violent tattoo set by the fire. There was a dull ache in his right eye-He wasn't even sure if it was there anymore, or if it was consumed by the demonic fire. Soon though, his lips were captured once again-And he was seared by the the heat, a hot ache now beginning to race through his burned veins. His world was all heat and fire- His family died in a fire, and so would he. He just lasted longer.

And the fire moved still, hypnotically.

He felt almost empty. The jagged pain was slowly fading, and he wanted to rest. But the fire had different plans in mind; It lowered it's burning lips back down to his own, a sort of detached burning beginning to sear his mouth once more. There was no hunger in the fire, oddly. Something that could of been affection if it could feel human emotion lingered in what could have been a hungry kiss, and Ciel wanted to cry. Dear Agony, I have nothing left to give- I have found the perfect end, you were to make it hurt- So I could disappear into the dirt, so please don't make me love you again... Dear Agony, you are cruel as cruel can be...

But even as he denied wishing loving the fire-Agony was it's name and Cruelty was it's game- he blindly felt for the humanoid form that Fire seemed to take and clutched as hard as he dared, ignoring the burning feel beneath his hands. He was blue and cold, and a black sky would burn... Love had pulled him down, and Hate had lifted him up... Was it the other way around?

Dear Agony, don't let go of me...

Somewhere far beyond this world, He felt nothing left... In a world of endless sand and screaming children, filthy cages- the smell of sulfur and fermenting blood was ever present, reminding him of a painful non-reality...

He blinked sluggishly.

No, he was still with his beloved Agony... Dear Agony, you are cruel as cruel can be, Don't let me go- keep me as long as you dare, and don't...don't...

Ciel closed his eyes for the last time, and the light in his eyes was gone for good. His empty, pretty shell of a head lolled slightly as the last of his soul escaped into the hungry kiss.

* * *

_"Sebastian?"_

_"Yes, my lord?"_

_"What am I to you?"_

_"You are my Master."_

_"Only for now."_

_"Only until the end, my lord."_

* * *

And he would be forgotten.

* * *

BAB: ... Crap, I cried again. Excuse me while I go and let out some more bawling, Okay? -Retreats into a distant corner and turns on the waterworks for about half an hour, before getting herself together and going back- Right, I'm back. Alright... _THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE 29 REVIEWS SO FAR! _I never expected my semi-rants would be accepted with so much enthusiasm! You have all been wonderful reviewers, and I could not have done it without you. Special thanks to all of my regular reviewers! ( Personally I want to hit maybe about a hundred reviews eventually, but hey. It's doubtful...I'm kind of a small-time authoress. I'm already so happy with your input!) Please review?

I do not own Kuroshitsuji!


	15. Heads Will Roll

Song: Heads will Roll by Yeah Yeah Yeahs

* * *

**i.**

"Why don't you leave?" Gleaming, too-sharp teeth ask him, moving in the darkness like the fraying edges of a nightmare. He doesn't know the answer, really so he adjusts his glasses, hoping that that it means something.

"I didn't know cats could smile," He retorts-And the words are wrong somehow, not something he was supposed to say. "Servants of death do," The Cat replies anyway in the dark, tail swishing with surety, like a tree branch in a forgotten breeze. "All of them do, no matter how hard they fight it."

"Which way do I go?"

The Cat dramatically pouts, as best as it's able-And then vanishes from the street, from outside the whore-house it was standing.

He waits, alone in the lamplight.

A voice, truly exhausted and horribly amused appears to his ear and whispers darkly: "They all lead to the same path."

"Where?" He asks, though he knows the answer.

"To the King."

**ii.**

He's walking through blood puddles, through decrepit cinema parking-lot grounds, ivy creeping over a nearly unrecognizable carriage, with bones of an old horse sleeping on the ground.

The lot is empty, vast and vaguely medical in the way it has appeared before him this time; Strange, how in life the things that are supposed to save end up being instruments to destroy. Behind him plays a movie, of who's story he's not sure of.

He passes by a large table, cluttered with charred chairs made of wood, such as those which might belong in a schoolroom. Taking a seat, he waits. For what?

**iii.**

"You need to pass the cake around, then cut it-That's the point of a looking glass cake," An exasperated cook says to him with aged blue eyes, shaking his grizzled hair out of the way like an old soldier readying himself for battle. "?" Says Sebastian, and he watches the mark hang curiously, politely in the air before him before dissipating like smoke.

If you were outside of it the glass, then roles would be reversed, he wants to tell the lion cook.

**iv.**

"What is lost can never be returned," A sleepy child, who couldn't be possibly older than nine says, pulling his head out of the tea-can that innocuously reads 'New Moon Drop.' "Whether it's me or someone else, it hardly matters."

He says to the child that he will fulfill his promise, no matter what.

"I'll hold you to that," The child says seriously, blue eyes widening and waking into something colder, sharper. "In return, I will fulfill mine." He offers to him a too-big blue ring, which he accepts.

As he does, the parking lot fills with the scent of death and dreams.

**v.**

"Mind the baby," The Duchess says to him, shoving a bundle of blankets into his arms. Her eyes are red, burning red and he wonders if The Cat would like them. Perhaps not, maybe he'll kill her for them.

Her cook is shaking far too much blood-iron into the pot of organs, he thinks-And he sneezes.

_(His arms are empty but for blankets; it was hope that she nursed instead of a child.)_

**vi.**

"I'm late, I'm late for a very important date," He's saying now, running. He's not sure what he's late for, but he remembers the child with the ring and the tea-can.

He knows that reaching the king is vital.

**vii.**

The Black King is made out of the sky, with hair like a night-lit sky and skin colored the perfectly peach clouds of sunset. People take him for granted, as he's always held a position to be always there. When they don't take him for granted, _that_is when he strikes- Eats them alive, tearing them apart for a wrong they have committed against him.

He wears mourning-clothes today, and watches the Duchess go by in her casket, dead by his own doing. (Hearts mean death, Diamonds mean greed, Clubs are for health, and _Spades-_Spades are for duty, but no symbolization in this world will ever stand for sentimentality.)

"She was my Aunt, you know." He says conversationally, and turns to show that both eyes are closed.

**viii.**

The King gazes over the bright lights of London, his heart pounding a steady _one-two-three_ in his rib cage as he sits in his throne, just outside of the border of where the battles take place. The main objective is to order and avoid capture, he knows this. "Knight to F5," He calls, and Sebastian complies with grace, extermination coming to those who seek harm to the King.

(This is the game that The King has played his entire life, ever since he stepped out of the cage)

**ix.**

The King doesn't have the safety that Alice did, by being trapped inside of a bottle. He struggles in the sweeping waves of destiny, trying to stay afloat. Eventually however, he sinks in the water, drowning.

Sebastian knows that this always has to be the case; that he has to rescue him. At least this sea of tears did not come from the king.

**x.**

The King is trapped inside of a house of cards, a courtroom. "Guilty!" The verdict comes, again and again. But he stands proudly, gazing up at the blond boy in the judge's seat, clad in white. "Those clothes do not suit you," He tells him with disdain at some point, and Sebastian agrees.

"What does it matter?" Alois shrugs, and claps his hands. "Guilty," He sings like the damned, and the silent woman with white hair opens her mouth obediently.

**xii.**

The King is sentenced to a fate worse than Death. "Remember your promise now," he tells his servant, "I've always told lies with this eye." he points to the eye that shines with a different contract than signed. "Remember, and fulfill. That's an order-An Order."

Sebastian can only helplessly agree, then watch as the woman with white hair drags the king over to the edge of another cliff, to send them both toppling into the seas of fate.

**xiii.**

He decides to not sleep any longer, despite his wound. There are more important things than sleep.

* * *

BAB: Whew! That was a long, long time, you guys. I'm so sorry I haven't updated. If you see a similar work like this though (points above) it's 'cause it's my new account. Please review to tell me how you liked it-Please! I don't know how bad I've gotten in my absence. ;A;

Edit: Actually, I think I'll say my goodbyes on this account. I do love this story, and I'll continue writing one shots, but... I'll say goodbye anyway, because I can't really write how I used to. Hope you'll like my new works, even if you don't recognize me. Thanks for your support, all of you.

In case you want to chat me up in other places or GAPE AT MY CIEL COSPLAY:

deviantArt: bttrswtnstlglia

tumblr: King-and-Throne.


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